What is the significance of this date? You should all remember. Something in your memory should be screaming out and you are now saying to yourself,
"Yes! There is something...but Ben, please tell us what it is. Enlighten us."
You are all going to kick yourselves for making me tell you but that it is the date of my last blog post. For those of you that could not remember, you should be ashamed of yourselves.
To confirm the exact time-scales:
It is 477 days since I last blessed you with my influential words of wisdom. For those that are fans of knowing everything, I have taken the time to break this down for you:
- 1 year, 3 months, 20 days.
- 68 weeks (rounded down)
- 686,880 minutes
- 11,448 hours
- 41,212,800 seconds
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| How I imagine your faces right now.. |
Friday, 9 March 2012
The return of the King (me). I know that you will be experiencing a whole range of emotions at this point in time. Angered that I haven't posted for such a long time, but overjoyed that I am now returning to fill the void that has been missing in your life for so long.
For those that are confused and not sure what emotions they are experiencing, please refer to the attached link below, pick out your favourites and leave your comments.
So the one question on your lips right now is probably along the lines of,
"What are you going to start posting about again Ben?"
Well my friends, I will be honest with you. The majority of my posts will be talking about topical issues, news items and the things that really piss me off. I could probably write hourly posts about this but I will summarise certain events and try my best to make them amusing. These 'events' could be in the news, or simply something I have experienced. I will give you two examples...
The first example is a news item. The Costa Concordia disaster. The cruise liner partially sank on the night of 13 January 2012 after hitting a reef off the Italian coast at Isola del Giglio, Tuscany, requiring the evacuation of the 4,252 people on board. The captain of the ship Francesco Schettino has admitted to making the following announcement moments before the sinking:
The first example is a news item. The Costa Concordia disaster. The cruise liner partially sank on the night of 13 January 2012 after hitting a reef off the Italian coast at Isola del Giglio, Tuscany, requiring the evacuation of the 4,252 people on board. The captain of the ship Francesco Schettino has admitted to making the following announcement moments before the sinking:
"My name is Francesco Schettino...and welcome to Jackass."
I am not joking about the event, that would be tasteless. I am merely pointing out that Captain Schettino is a thoughtless, inconsiderate, selfish bastard.
Aside from this point, I do think that all future passengers should wear something similar to the following when on board a cruise liner:
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| For that special evening on a cruise... |
My second example is something that really pissed me off. I was on the train home from the gym (yes I work out) on Wednesday when I came across the following two objects:
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| A fat man |
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| A MASSIVE Dairy Milk Caramel chocolate bar |
Yes that's right. A fat man and a Dairy Milk Caramel chocolate bar. Harmless you'd think? A large, male human specimen enjoying his life by eating a nutritional bar of shit. Why did this anger me? You want to know? I will tell you...
For those of you that have me on Facebook you may have noticed a status update around the time that I came face-to-face with these two objects:
On review I feel that this is a little harsh.....in the way that I have described it. Harsh on you, the reading public, as I failed to describe the noise he was really making. Not only did it sound like a cow eating grass, it had a bit of a dog drinking water from a bowl in it too. He destroyed the bar, 32 squares of chocolate, within TWO MINUTES. I don't know about you but it would take me at least a full day to eat the whole thing.
He then got off the train and bought a pasty. Fat shit.
All the best,
Ben x
